History Channel’s The Bible: Mission

One thing I’ll say for him, Jesus is cool. – Jesus Christ Superstar

In this week’s episode, the plot focusses around Jesus’ mission and eventual betrayal. I’m really starting to lose interest.  All throughout this episode, I kept wishing I was watching Godspell, or at the very least Jesus Christ Superstar.

The writers play fast and loose with the time frame, and why the heck is Jesus so melodramatic?  Most of my problems this episode had to do with directing/acting choices.  I mentioned last week Jesus gives Dawson face.  This episode he not only gave Dawson face, but also Kirk sentences:  unnecessary pauses and “smell the fart” acting.

We finally have a girl who talks regular too, but her backstory was not given.  She’s Mary, but which one?  Martha’s sister?  Mary Magdalene?  Are they the same person?  The famous foot with hair washing incident is completely glossed over, though I can’t say I’m surprised.  Also, there were other women who was with Jesus, like Susanna.

Alright, here are my major beefs:

When Jesus gets mad at the money lenders, I wanted to see him get mad.  In this episode, he walked into the temple, looked around at the money lenders, then started tipping over tables like he was a hipster douchebag trying to get attention.  Let’s see him rage with righteous anger!  Jesus was fully man, The Bible, which meant he got right pissed.  Also, when he found out Lazarus died nothing.  The text says, “Jesus wept” (shortest verse of the Bible, right AWANA kids?)  All The Bible Jesus did was smell someone’s fart.

When Jesus announces himself as the Messiah Isaiah had foretold, there was such pausing and melodramaticness.  I just never saw Jesus as being emo.  I think he just said, “the prophecy has been fulfilled through me”, and went on with his day. He wasn’t trying to prove himself like the episode’s Jesus was.  Just the facts, and on he went.

There was no lead-up for Judas’ betrayal.  In the text, he gets mad that Mary Magdalene “wastes” perfume on Jesus’ feet and is rebuked.  No mention of that.  Also, I don’t think the disciples were in the know about Judas’ betrayal.  There are discussions that only John (and where the heck is John??) knew that Judas’ would betray Jesus.  More on Judas in a second.

The Last Supper: Jesus talks about how he’s going to be betrayed and beaten and killed.  Nope.  Just tell them you’re going to be betrayed.  More accurate.  Also, you forgot to wash your disciples’ feet.  Remember?  Peter got all huffy?

Gethsemane: An interesting montage of everyone praying to their gods (including Pilate’s wife praying to her ancestors).  When Judas comes to identify Jesus with a kiss (because the servant didn’t know who Jesus was/it was dark?), the kiss was one of the most awkward kisses I’ve seen – and I watched all 6 seasons of Dawson’s Creek (sorry for the over-abundance of Dawson references, but Joey was a weird kisser).  It’s not shown as a kiss in greeting that everyone would have done in that time, but it was a lingering cheek kiss with Jesus slowly bringing his hand up to cup Judas’ face.  See?  Weird.

Next week, the Passion.

Oh, and check out The Whitest Guy In The Bible:

20130326_220231

I *think* this is supposed to be John. Doesn’t really look like his nickname would be Sons of Thunder.

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2 Comments

  1. […] History Channel’s The Bible: Mission (kimcheel.wordpress.com) […]

  2. […] History Channel’s The Bible: Mission (kimcheel.wordpress.com) The Last Supper: Jesus talks about how he’s going to be betrayed and beaten and killed.  Nope.  Just tell them you’re going to be betrayed.  More accurate.  Also, you forgot to wash your disciples’ feet.  Remember?  Peter got all huffy? […]


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